🔥 Breaking

Your friend is ridiculous.
We’ll publish the story.

The Roast Report turns the people you love into hilarious front-page news — a personalized, fictional roast written like a real article. The funniest gift you’ll give this year. From $19.

Start Roasting → Read a sample roast
⚡ Personalized in 48 hrs ✏️ Human-reviewed 📄 Print, frame, or read aloud 😀 100% fictional, 0% hard feelings
Straight from the newsroom

🔥 Fresh Roasts

Real people. Fake news. Zero survivors.

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Before you buy

🎁 Gift Guides & Roast Tips

The funny-gift research, done for you.

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Someone you love is overdue for a roast.

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